carol ann lynch & her staff at midtown bar are hogs masquerading as people

many things about dis scuntry just ain’t right
and some jokers dont mean to change
i say we’ve become a land of low to no standards
but a lot of jokers here still feel like we are going places with our low to no standards

the jokers in my view are unaware of what standards are so to them
we going places
cause why?
cause some negroe can afford to buy the latest samsung galaxy on amazon and ship it in
or have it bought by a family member living overseas and shipped in

i used to be a regular at sidewalk cafe for a hot minute or two
i was a bit depressed after it was closed cause i like live music
and guyana is not a place where you can easily find someone playing an instrument
after it reopened again i couldn’t understand the astro turf, harley davidson bike parked out front and a few other tackiness out and about the place
but is not my place

i stopped in a few times waiting for my phone to be fixed next door and went randomly about 5 other times
there were many things you pick up on that drive you insane but you calm yourself into the temporary acceptance of the mediocre
cause again is not like you living deh
it’s hooters without the boobs
and dont get me wrong i have no problem with women in barely fitting clothes or breasts
maybe am getting old
but sometimes it’s a bit too much and you need a break

so i goes there yesterday to meet a friend and drink two banks beers
i borrowing a picture from midtown to show exactly what i talking about
midtown bar
i sit down at the bar about where that napkin holder deh on the counter
my friend is sitting to my left
the girl come to ask we what we drinking and like too many guyanese in these type of jobs, it looked like we disturbed her
we order two beers and start chatting
the tv obliquely across from us showing snow and the rest random programming
two guys are sitting all the way to our left at the bar talking
the lady who served us the beer was busy counting money so i asked another one if she could find a football game on the tv
she seem upset at the request, mumble something, but start scrolling through the channels
about four other girls at the end of the bar chatting cause the place empty

the girl say they ain got no sports on
i pop out my web book, log on to the free wireless and checked
yep. west indies playing australia

excuse me. west indies playing cricket. please put it on
she finds the game and mumbles something
her fellow coworkers chime in with a few mumbles loud enough for me to hear them
i ain say nothing to them

excuse me. can you turn up the volume a bit so i can hear what’s going on?
this is not a sports bar
excuse me?
this is not a sports bar. we about to play music
excuse me. i would like to hear what’s going on in the game. you can play your music later
yuh ain hear wuh ah seh?

a moment to talk to mself : mark! yes [i respond to myself talking to myself] mark!! yes. maintain your cool but keep the conversation going. ok. let’s see if we can make this happen

excuse me. i would just like to hear what’s going on in the game. you can always play your music
but this is not a sports bar
ok. i understand all that but i would like to hear what the announcer is saying
but is not you alone in here
no. is not me alone. it’s me and my friend and those two guys at the end of the bar meeting

one of her coworkers at the end of the bar shout out. watch doan worry wid he turn on de music
i say something to myself and ignored that

ahh are you telling me i cannot hear what’s on that tv?
i tellin you this is not a sports bar. we gon play music just now
young ladies at the end of the bar, i can hear you. this is not how you run a business
is not a sports bar!
i hear what you’re saying but this place is empty and i’d like to hear the game

this shit went on for about three minutes maybe but it seemed like 3 years
i dont know if it was happening or if i was imagining it happening but i could feel my cerebellum pushing my spinal cord off centre

a moment to talk to self : mark! listen dont talk to me right now

let me tell yall something. we dont have to drink here you know or come here.
well galang yuh way. girl turn on de music
why we gotta argue for everything in this country?

i realised this was all pointless
the guy down the end of the bar shook his head in disgust and smiled
we got up and left
i told them to enjoy their music

one of the girls realising the bullshit they were engaging in ran outside to the manager to tell her side of the story
i guess suspecting we might stop and talk to her on the way out

enter carol ann lynch, the manager

first we just walked out and headed into the street
then i turned back to the manager
she turned on her sour attitude before i uttered a word
i talk to myself answer myself and breathe

excuse me. i was in the bar there just now and wanted to listen to the cricket
this is not a sports bar
hold on. the bar is empty and we would like to listen to the cricket match
well this is not a sports bar and we only show important games here
oh ok. so west indies versus australia is not an important game. why we gotta argue for everything in this country?
you the one arguing

she look me up and down like i was a piece of shit with a nice smirk on her face
the girl standing by her side smiled comfortably. her manager gave her the support she needed

so you tellin me…you know what, yall have a good day
she kept mumbling something to me which my brain by now had shut down my entire auditory system
i could just see her lips moving and the contempt on her face
in her warped thinking she won
she showed me who was the boss

we rolled on down the street and went to hibiscus to enjoy more guyanese hospitality and serviec

if my memory fails me and you ever happen to see me in or near midtown bar. i hereby give you permission to grab me by the scruff of my neck drag me down the street.

recommendation : don’t waste your time or money going to midtown bar. the staff busy listening to music and it would be rude of you to disturb them. no comment on the joker manager.

2 responses to “carol ann lynch & her staff at midtown bar are hogs masquerading as people”

  1. This is the one and only Carol Ann Lynch and you Mr. Jacobs need to take a good shower before you present your self to the public. Take that beer money and buy soap and deodorant.

    1. that’s the best you’ve got? well done

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